In their attempts to spice-up - read manipulate - the sport over the years, Formula One's powers that be have put forward some crazy solutions.

However, the proposed solution to one of the biggest shortcoming of the new formula goes beyond farce and almost into the realms of insanity.

The sport's commercial boss, Sean Bratches has revealed that plans are underway for a microphone to be placed on cars' exhausts in order that the sound can be amplified.

"One of the things that we want to amplify going forward are the sounds of the sport," he told Reuters, "because they are viscerally moving to fans and critically important in all the research that we do."

He then revealed that David Hill, a man with a "stellar reputation in sports television and broadcast innovation" is working on the idea.

"He's working with a German concern to develop a ceramic microphone that we can actually adhere to the exhaust pipe to get the true amplification of sound for fans," said Bratches.

The sound of the new formula introduced in 2014 has grated from the outset, and was one of the reasons former F1 supremo Bernie Ecclestone was so against the new formula.

Jean Todt has warned that there is no going back and that hybrid is here to stay, and as a result fans need to get used to a quieter F1.

However, for many it was the sound - that certain sound - be it of V12s, Flat-12s, H16s, V8s or V10s that first attracted them to the sport.

If Formula One has become that lost that it is seriously looking at placing microphones on exhaust pipes and amplifying the sounds, why not go a step further and fit each car with a sound card that can be use to recreate legendary engine sounds from the past.

How thrilling to see Sebastian Vettel harrying Lewis Hamilton in Abu Dhabi to the accompaniment of a Flat-12, as they lap Fernando Alonso and his screaming Matra V12.

Better still why not simply fit spoked wheels to the cars and attach playing cards to them.

Alternatively, there's...

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READERS COMMENTS

1. Posted by mickl, 27/09/2017 1:48

"Won't it be cheaper to get all the watching fans to go "brum, brum" every time a car goes by? It'll have the added bonus of 'engaging' the fans that Liberty so craves."

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2. Posted by Spindoctor, 25/09/2017 8:02

"@Canuk has nailed it.
As Bill Clinton never said: "It's the racing, stupid""

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3. Posted by TokyoAussie, 25/09/2017 4:26

"Must've been April 1st when he said that, right...?"

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4. Posted by ryanhellyer, 23/09/2017 9:02

"This has to be a joke. I assume everyone thought of this same idea, but just laughed it off as an insanely stupid idea."

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5. Posted by NS Biker, 23/09/2017 6:42

"Here is the solution. No development required.
I am sure the F1 designers can add the required access port and amp.

http://www.soundracer.se/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1RZwwYXNzgM"

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6. Posted by stackvideo, 23/09/2017 1:34

"This sounds like someone doing something with their hand while watch one of those "you know" movies."

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7. Posted by Natcheztoo, 23/09/2017 0:47

"Everyone on here is making light hearted jest of this asinine idea. This is much too important for that! I, for one, am sick and tired of having this euro-green crap shoved down my throat. This has to stop, and soon. The V10's have already been developed and proven; just take them off the shelf and let's go. Oh, I wouldn't limit the revs to 18,000 either.

I have been following this sport for a long time. I cannot abide by this. As it is, I zip through the recorded qualifying sessions. Then I watch the race from its inception to see if any passes take place. If not, and the leader of the race is pulling away, I will then fast forward to the first pit stops. If the leader still retains the lead and nothing is developing in the race, I will either abandon ship or skip forward in 20 minute or so intervals.

Meanwhile, in the background, there is a low-guttural moan, very much like the sound of an outboard engine on a small boat, that could put a disinterested person to sleep.

If (if the Queen had balls she'd have been King) IndyCar had sense, they would take this opportunity to change their formula to big, bellowing, whining, ear-splitting, fire breathing, high-revving engines, and then to hell and away with F1. I used to love it. Now, I very nearly loathe it. What matter? The powers that be do not believe that the paying customer is ALWAYS RIGHT!

F*** 'em.
"

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8. Posted by Yeyox02, 22/09/2017 22:22

"Don´t worry, be happy. Just put a megaphone in full blast just behind the tailpipe and that's it. Ha ha ha ha ha ha - LOL. FIA´s brains must be burning after this tremendous idea. The world must be making fun of them. I cannot stop laughing."

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9. Posted by Stitch431, 22/09/2017 22:22

"It is like putting a laundry knife on my son's bike to make him believe there's an engine inside... It works for a bit but he feels cheated anyway and I can't blame him."

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10. Posted by Rock Doc, 22/09/2017 20:10

"There is also a rumor going around that the new microphone will count as one of the components that will incur a grid penalty.

If the sound does not match up to the new FIA regulation on exhaust noise volume then the driver will be given the choice of taking a 5 grid slot penalty or having to make up the sound deficit but making the required sound effects over the intercom."

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11. Posted by Kilo 7-7, 22/09/2017 18:56

"Presumably hese amplified sounds would be pumped through static speakers positioned around the track? A huge component of the iconic sound is from the rising pitch of the exhaust note as cars approach and the lowering pitch as they pass due to the doppler effect as well the reverb of that sound. Static speakers are going to do nothing but present the drone of the engines with neither of those essential components. "

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12. Posted by habentsen, 22/09/2017 18:48

"For the record.

F1 cars have raced with microphones onboard for years, there’s a DPA Microphones 4062 omni lav placed on the cars to record the sound for television.

However, putting the sound in speakers on the car or around the track to «improve the show» is a totally different thing and probably the silliest suggestion since Neville Chamberlain walked off a plane with a piece of paper in his hand."

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13. Posted by Jezzer, 22/09/2017 18:41

"I think the current text speak of "WTF" is quite appropriate here, not for this latest addition to the long list of stupid ideas but for the fact that this MORON still has a job as the head of the FIA. Do you think his real agenda might be to kill off F1 as we know it so something new, beneficial to the motor manufacturers and road relevant could be put in its place?
"

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14. Posted by GrahamG, 22/09/2017 18:19

"Why is anyone surprised about this daft idea from the tower of daft ideas?"

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15. Posted by Lapps, 22/09/2017 17:59

"Or you could increase the peak fuel flow restriction by 5-10% giving higher revs, more noise and higher pitch in one easy move. "

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F1's insane solution to noise issue

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