Dun-right

01/11/2018
FEATURE BY MAX NOBLE

The family and I recently indulged in the delight of re-watching Christopher Nolan's masterful film Dunkirk.

From the gritty simplicity of the opening scene to the visual spectacle of the beach under attack and various ships, boats and planes coming to grievous ends in a scintillatingly waltzing timeline it is a master work of story-telling, and unquestionably Dun-right.

It is already back on the family list of 'Must Watch Again' movies, where I think it might well live for some time to come.

It is such a joy when something is done-right, rather than being done for all the wrong reasons or, heaven forbid, simply done cynically for the money.

The Spitfire was done-right. The Dunkirk evacuation, given the shocking situation the British Expeditionary Force found itself in, was against all odds, done-right. The SS Jaguar 100 was done-right too. A beautiful car. And elegant mechanical watches (select hand-crafted manufacturer of your choice) were both beautifully built, and still priced at sensible levels for interested parties. Done-right too!

Ah, and motor racing then... Well the racing was seat-of the pants, the circuits were raw, and the cars were cutting edge for the times, far, far faster than anything road going at the time. No danger of a Gucci detailed, super-computer designed, limited edition zillion-dollar road car lapping a winding track within fractions of a second of a racing beast.

Indeed the beautiful 3.5 litre version of the SS Jaguar 100 could cover 0-60 mph in around 10.5 seconds, and could hit 100 mph (hence the name '100'). Compare that to the 1939 Auto Union Type D (as raced by Rosemeyer and Nuvolari) which developed nearly 500 bhp, had a top speed of 211 mph (340 kph), and could generate wheel spin at speeds over 100 mph, while accelerating 0-60 mph in mere seconds.

Both, without question done-right, but worlds apart in terms of performance. If one then looks to typical road cars of the time, rather than the somewhat expensive, and rare, Jaguar, then one finds the "motoring every man" (keeping in mind that car ownership of any sort back in 1939 was somewhat rare) and one is drawn to the Austin 12, a rather large, heavy car that produced a feeble 40 bhp. It had a top speed in the region of 60 mph, and took around 60 seconds - a minute - to get there.

Possibly, the Austin 12 was not done-quite-so-right, but it highlights the huge gaps between a typical car in 1939, a sporting car, and a pure racing car. The Auto Union possesses a top speed over 3.5 times that of the Austin, and is around 20 times faster 0-60... Given a mid-range Toyota Corolla can cover 0-60 mph in around 8.5 seconds, and has a top speed around 110 mph, these multiplying factors would suggest a modern racing car should top-out at around 385 mph (616 kph), and cover 0-60 mph in around 0.42 seconds... Well the top speed is about right, but we are somewhat off hitting 60 in 0.42 of a second, so let us run with mostly-done-right...

Which brings us to the spiritual side of things. The earnest passion with which these machines were crafted back in 1939, compared to the mass produced Corolla, and the sterile, clinical, some might say highly irritating, manner in which racing rules, run off areas, and bickering over engine rules are executed today compared with 1939.

Rosemeyer died in an Auto Union in January 1938 on the autobahn near Frankfurt while setting a new land speed record. His average over a few runs was 268 mph (432 kph) when, as gusty winds increased, he elected to go out again, and was tragically killed when the car careered from the road. His spirit for adventure, and the remarkable power of the streamliner he was driving were both done-right. Tragically safety back then was not.

Enough of this casting an eye backward. Much in the past was done-right. Much, quite simply was not, or while judged as acceptable "...back in the day" would not be considered so positively today.

If we unbend from our history books and look around us what is done-right, right now within the universe of Formula One?

Well... Lewis is a done-right champion. Equalling Fangio, and but a modest two more championships off matching the remarkable Schumacher.

Unquestionably in his day Michael did so much right it was beyond the ability of other mere mortal drivers to keep pace with the man. Yet today with limited testing and no tyre wars how would Michael have faired?

Each sporting hero is a champion of his day, it is a pondering that is only done-right, when kept in historical context. Something which is now so much harder to do as the points system has changed so much, even since Michael's day. I'd say the points system is either, not-done-right, or we need to add an extra column to the history books and give all past seasons points under the rules of today. Which would then make for some interesting moments when only your 'best' races of the season were counted, or half points awarded. So no, points are not done-right.

Safety has been done-so-right that it now takes a tragic multiplication of factors to result in the sad death of a driver. Long may this continue to be the case, and if it only saves one life every ten years then the Halo is priceless, and hence done-right.

Rules... oh dear me. Society as a whole is to blame here, as it is the "if you can measure it you have a duty to control it", and the "if it happens once in 500 years we need a specific rule for it" approach to so much in life that has shaped F1 into the morass of rules that stifle racing today. Nope, not much done-right here, so let us hurry along.

F1 Timing App anyone? (Hope editor Balfe was seated when he read those words...) Sure as Chickens and Eggs have an interlinked existence, not a trace of done-right here... no sir...

Growing the fan base globally. Well Bernie gets a done-right with five gold stars and bar. He took it form a bunch of passionate hobbyists, newspaper columns (remember those?) and a few weak TV signals ambling around the globe to a world encompassing sporting mega-brand that was gifting gold to its owners faster than a one ton golden-egg laying goose could ever dream of managing. Then we have the short term genius of moving it all behind global paywalls. If you're a fan this is assuredly not done-right. If you're making a short term grab for cash, I'm sure you've already awarded yourself a done-right written in gold on a pure block of unobtainium...

Cost cap! Well no done-rights to hand out here, not even to Bernie and Max. We do have one in waiting (a cheap one, made in China by robots) that might be awarded to Liberty Media post 2021... please dear reader, do not hold your breath that long, you could suffer significant harm. And all for no good cause. We shall see.

And yet... Lewis' storming charge in Mexico was an act done-right. The spirited overtakes throughout the race were done-right. Vettel breaking off a TV interview to heartily congratulate Lewis was done-right. The Red Bull, Ferrari, and Mercedes approaches to race day were all done-right so we had actual on track action.

A surprising amount done-right all on the same day with no direct input from Liberty, and not a Super Bowl experience in sight... Actually one could say the brilliant "amphitheatre" setting at the remodelled Mexican track slightly recalls the stadium setting of the super bowl, but I'm somewhat confident that the American Super Bowl was not at the top of the designers minds when penning this wonderful refresh. A newly returned circuit update done-right.

So rather like a great actor trapped in a shocking script, or a genius director working with Alvin and the Chipmunks, the drivers managed to get it done-right in Mexico, despite, rather than because of, Liberty's not-too-much-done-right-at-all approach since taking over.

And the master of done-right, right now is Lewis. A season-long class of pure mastery that will surely be the stuff of legend in decades to come.

We can only hope the directors of the curious improv world play that is F1 2018 give Lewis and the other drivers a script, sorry, I mean, an environment worthy of their done-right talent, so the viewing joy of us fans can be done-right too.

Then, may-be in years to come, just as I am likely to bore younger generations by grabbing the Blue Ray of Dunkirk while uttering the words, "You've got to see this!", we might all be grabbing the season review of 2021 while exclaiming "You've got to see this, it was so done-right back then!"

Max Noble.

Learn more about Max and check out his previous features, here

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Published: 01/11/2018
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